


Kiss and fuck and stay alive

by Arvari



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Falling In Love, Light Angst, Loki Does What He Wants, Loki Feels, Loki Needs a Hug, M/M, Sexual Tension, Some Humor, Tony Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-14
Updated: 2015-03-16
Packaged: 2018-03-17 20:10:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3542309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arvari/pseuds/Arvari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the <a href="http://frost-iron.tumblr.com/post/112789521692/loki-is-about-to-kill-tony-tony-kisses-loki-for">prompt</a>: Loki is about to kill Tony. Tony kisses Loki for the hell of it before he can. Loki is so shocked that he doesn't kill Tony. He drops him like he's been burned in fact. Then it happens again. Tony learns he's quite okay with bartering his mouth (and other parts of him) to a God if it keeps him kicking. (Loki learns it's all fun and games until someone starts getting fond...)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Tony

The first time it happened, I blamed the lack of oxygen in my brain. Well, when there's a pale, but terribly strong hand grabbing your throat (and it's not the first time it's happened), you don't exactly think things through.

I don't know where did that idea come from. I just know that one moment, we were on a roof, Loki was throttling me, growling at me and telling me I was about to die, and the next moment, I was pressing my lips into his.

Maybe it's just an instinct of mine. You know, _when someone's face is close to yours, no matter that they are trying to kill you, close the distance and just kiss._

But it seemed like a pretty good idea. A pretty _cool_ idea. I mean, what did I have to lose? Would he strangle me faster? Well, good for me. Would he make my death slow and painful? Maybe I could find a way to escape, or someone could save me before I actually die.

Not that I thought about any of that the moment I kissed him. To be honest, it's just now that I try to come up with excuses.

Maybe it was just because his lips looked so good and soft an they were so close to mine.

They actually felt pretty good and soft, too. Softer than you'd think.

I had a pleasure of enjoying them for only a few seconds, before suddenly, Loki jumped away from me (literally, he was there one second, the other he was as far from me as humanly – _godly?_ \- possible). And he was staring at me with wide green eyes that looked like they were about to pop out of his head, and his mouth opened so wide he could get a dental check-up.

“How... How _dare you_?” he managed to say before vanishing into thin air.

A second later, there was a loud crash and Hulk's roar.

Well, it seems that event if I didn't kiss Loki that day, I wouldn't exactly die, but... Yeah. Never mind.

 

The second time it happened, we were in Central Park and this time, we weren't even battling _Loki_. There were some Doombots on the loose and we were hunting them in different parts of the city. I was in some trouble, yeah, a little outnumbered, but I could have managed.

And suddenly, all five bots just... _imploded_. And then, my helmet and faceplate flew away somewhere, just like the last time, and then the piece of armor covering my neck, _just like the fucking last time_ , and yeah, there he was, right in front of me, those long fingers around my neck once again and a very furious glint in those green eyes. But he wasn't trying to actually strangle me, not yet.

“Oh, hi, love,” I smiled, which only made him squeeze harder. _Bad idea, Tony_.

“You dared,” he growled. “You dared to kiss a god. You dared to kiss the prince of Asgard.”

“Excuse me?” I blinked. “I never kissed _Thor_.”

His eyes widened in shock. _Even worse idea, Tony_.

Loki's face came closer once again and his grip on my neck tightened. Killing me intimately, maybe?

“It seems to me you have a death wish, Anthony Stark,” he whispered and a shiver ran down my spine. It wasn't because of what he said. It was because of the tone of his voice, so deep, so sexy, so...

“Maybe I do,” I managed to say.

“In that case, I will gladly-”

And I was kissing him again.

_The worst idea ever, Tony_.

Or so I thought, before he started kissing me back. You know, he didn't the first time around. He was too busy trying to get away from me. But this time, when I pressed my lips into his, not only he didn't jump away (or push me away, whatever), but he started to, however hesitantly, press _his_ lips into _mine_ instead.

Until he realized what he was doing and I suddenly found myself flying away from him and straight through the nearest tree. I expected Loki to land a killing blow on me the moment I hit the ground, but nothing came. In fact, when I managed to sit up and look around, the god was gone.

My back was hurting like hell, I had splinters of wood in my hair and my face was badly scraped from hitting the ground, but I was alive.

And Loki actually kissed me back before he freaked out.

_Oh, hell. What did I get myself into?_

 

The third time, Loki just appeared right in the middle of a battle, grabbed my arm and then... I don't even fucking know. I was in Washington with all the other Avengers, and then, in just a blink of an eye, I was standing in the middle of an old factory building. Dust all around, graffiti on the walls, glass from the broken windows on the floor. And a very pissed off God of Mischief in front of me.

_Yeah, I can see a pattern here_ , my brain helpfully said.

And then I heard Black Widow's voice in my ears.

“Iron Man? Where the _hell_ are you?! We saw Loki and you-”

“Uhm, sorry, I got kinda carried away. Literally. I have no idea where I am. Jarvis?”

“The navigation system is compromised, sir, and so is the flying. And repulsors. And-”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it. Nat, the suit is as useful as a can right now. I'll need a lift when you're done there. Jarvis, try to reboot the systems. Or at least get my location.”

“Tony, is Loki there?”

I looked at the still pretty pissed off god who was currently trying to kill me with his gaze alone.

“No, Nat,” I said out loud. “He probably just wanted to get me away from Washington, no idea why. Watch out, in case he returns.”

A tiny smirk appeared on Loki's face. I lifted my faceplate.

“Stark,” the bastard said. “You will not need a lift. Your body will.”

“Oh, it's this game again,” I rolled my eyes. “You know, if you really want to kill me, do it in the battle. Don't make it dramatic, just stab me and go. No big deal.”

“Your death is 'no big deal' to you?” He raised an eyebrow. “You mortals really do surprise me sometimes.”

“I know. I've done it twice in the past two weeks,” I smirked.

_Of course, Tony, just be sassy to a guy who obviously wants you dead_.

“Do not _ever_ talk about that again,” Loki warned. “You had no _right_!”

“Come on, it was just a kiss. And you seemed to enjoy it the second time around. Until you decided to break that poor tree with my own body.”

_Maybe I really do have a death wish_.

“Do not think, Stark, that I don't see trough your game. You think you can survive by _kissing_ me? Well, you cannot. I don't know who you bet with-”

“Wait, bet?” I blinked. “It wasn't a _bet_ , you idiot. It was a really stupid idea of someone who was about to die and... Wait, are you so pissed off because you think it was a bet?”

“You are a mortal, Stark. You have no right to kiss a _god_. You have no right to kiss-”

“The prince of Asgard, yeah. Oh, what the hell.”

If I was about to die, and it seemed I really _was_ this time around, with the suit out and no way to locate me, so no way The Avengers or anyone else could save me, trapped God knows where with a crazy god...

I know it was stupid to play the same card for the third time, but once again, I had nothing left to lose.

This time, our mouths almost _crashed_ together. And I swear that when I grabbed his waist and raised my head, his face came _forward_. He kissed back from the very beginning. My helmet disappeared and his fingers weren't around my throat, but in my hair, grabbing, pulling.

_What the fuck are you doing, Tony? He's hot, right, but he's a villain. He's letting you stay alive, but you're not doing it for that, do you? He's a villain, and he's Thor's brother, and... And he's biting your lower lip, damn it._

Suddenly, my suit just fell apart. There were pieces of it all over the floor, I was only in my undersuit and Loki's fingers were digging into my hips and he was kissing me, _hungry, he's so fucking hungry_ , and I was kissing him back. It was a pretty violent kiss, but a kiss nevertheless.

And then his hand found its way into my pants. No way he could ever blame me for that, he was the one taking the initiative.

He was the one who grabbed my dick. He was the one who grabbed my ass. He was the one who pushed me against that wall. I was just letting him do it all. And moaning occasionally.

Well, he could blame me for saying _'just fuck me already'_ , but that was when he was about to do it anyway. And he did, only seconds later.

During the next few minutes, a thought came to me for a few times (you know, in those rare moments when I was conscious enough to actually _think_ and not just _feel_ ) that he might be trying to kill me. Especially when he was hitting my prostate with his every thrust and kissing me, _still so terribly hungry_ , at the same time.

Needless to say, I wouldn't mind dying like that. Not at all. It could even be my life goal to die during an absolutely mind-blowing sex with the God of Mischief.

But I didn't die. I blacked out for a moment when I came, yeah, but I managed to stay alive.

I wanted to kiss him when it was over, but he'd been gone before my legs stopped shaking.

 

The fourth time was the same day, only a few hours later.

I was in my living room. I refused to celebrate the victory with the others. I told them I was tired and angry that Loki managed to fuck my suit up with his magic. I told them I was going to think about how to prevent it the next time. No one questioned it.

The truth is, I just wanted to lay down and try _not_ to think about Loki. And fucking. I was still sore and, to be honest, it was the best feeling I'd had for the past few months. Which, to be even more honest, scared me to death.

_What the hell were you thinking, Tony? You can't fuck villains, no matter how hot they are. No matter how much you like it. No matter that it's apparently the only way to stay alive. You're a hero, and heroes don't do things like that. You should just accept your destiny and-_

“I have a deal.”

I nearly fell from the couch.

“What the _fuck_?!”

I jumped up. Loki was standing right next to my bar and he looked... amused.

“Would you like a drink, Stark?” he asked.

“This is my flat,” I said. “This is my fucking flat. You don't offer me drinks in my flat, _I_ offer _you_ drinks.”

“Will you offer me a drink?”

“The hell I won't.”

Loki shrugged and picked up two glasses and a bottle of scotch. Then he was walking to me and I couldn't come up with anything to say. He set the glasses on the table and poured the drinks. As if he was the one at home here.

“As I said,” he smirked. “I have a deal.”

“No trying to kill me now?” I asked, just to make sure.

“Not until we talk.”

I took my glass and drank all its contents. Loki's smile grew wider.

“Okay. What's the deal? Wait, let me guess. You won't kill me, but I must promise never to kiss you again?”

“No, Stark. Quite the opposite, in fact.”

I blinked. For a few times.

“Wait, _what_?”

“You noticed that I quite... enjoyed our time together today, didn't you?”

I remembered his quiet moans and hot breath and that little almost-whimper when he came.

“You could say that, yeah,” I nodded.

“I am willing to let you stay alive if we...” He hesitated.

“Fuck again?” I said and raised my eyebrow. “Oh, shit. That makes sense. How long haven't you had sex? Wait. You weren't a virgin, were you? No, of course you weren't, you knew exactly what you were doing. But how long since-”

“Stark, if you don't cease your babbling, I might reconsider my offer and kill you right now.”

“Shall I stand in front of the window?” I smirked. “Because, honestly, I don't know if I'm interested in that deal of yours. I mean, what's in it for me? You are the one obviously hungry for more sex. I can get as much of it as I want, all I have to do is flash a smile and show the girl or the boy my credit cards.”

“What's in it for you? You get to live.”

“Oh. Right. So we're gonna fuck and I'm gonna stay alive for another... day? Another week? Another hour? You know that technically speaking that would be a rape, don't you? If you tell me you'll kill me if I don't sleep with you-”

“But you don't see it like that, dear Anthony.”

“You think?”

“Yes. Because you don't have to agree. You can call your suit. You can call The Avengers. You can fight me. And if you defeat me, there will be no deal. But you enjoyed it today, too. Or am I not better than those boys and girls who fall in love with your money and the Iron Man?”

“But you're not falling in love with me,” I said.

“No, I'm not. And isn't that much better?”

“They don't fall in love with me, either. They spread their legs and when it's over, they go.”

“I am not going to spread my legs for you.”

“I know.”

“Anthony Stark,” Loki smiled. “How long haven't you been the bottom?”

“Too long.”

“What a shame. Because you so obviously enjoy it.”

And when exactly did he come so close to me?

“O-okay,” I said. “So the deal is... Kiss and fuck and stay alive?”

“Exactly.”

“It's still a rape.”

His hands were on my waist and I found myself trembling with anticipation. He was right. I loved being the bottom, yet I almost never was, because I did it only with people I trusted not to inform the press the moment they leave my bedroom. I am not ashamed of my sex life, I never was, but why should everyone know what _exactly_ does Tony Stark like?

“If it helps, we can say I'm letting you stay alive and you're paying me with your body.”

“Oh, so I am not a victim, but a whore,” I smirked.

He rolled his eyes.

“And what if there was no deal?” His face was now so close to mine I could feel his breath on my cheek. “What if there were no consequences for saying no? You have your chance. I won't kill you if you refuse today. We can make the deal tomorrow. What are you going to do now, Stark? Think it through.”

I didn't think it through. I didn't think _at all_ in fact. I just kissed him.

 

We made _The Deal_ three months ago.

And I haven't felt more alive in my life than I do now.

Outside of my flat, we fight.

Inside of my flat, we banter and argue and kiss and fuck and occasionally cuddle.

He would never admit the latter out loud. Even I have some trouble with it. But when we lay on the couch and drink scotch and watch TV together...

Yeah. He doesn't let me stay alive, he _makes me feel_ alive.

_Fuck, Tony, this is getting serious..._


	2. Loki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second chapter, this time from Loki's point of view.

I should have killed him when I still had the chance. I should have never let him kiss me. I should have never let him get under my skin. Or into my pants.

Of course, you could say I was the one to get into his pants, first. But he started it. I was in shock. Completely stunned. Even though it was the third time he tried that trick, it was still... surprising. Who would expect him to do it _again_? Not me, certainly.

But I must admit it wasn't completely his fault. When I felt his lips on mine, when I felt his passion, I was lost. I had been starving for things like this for much too long. How long it has been since someone actually kissed me? In Asgard, I was never what the Midgardians (and especially Stark) would describe as a _catch_. Not blonde enough, not muscular enough, not _Thor_ enough. I have had many lovers, yes, I am not some desperate virgin who cannot even seduce a girl or a boy, but when was the last time someone kissed me without only kissing the _Prince of Asgard_?

I know, I know. Stark only kissed his would-be murderer. How exactly is that better than kissing a possible heir of the throne?

I cannot answer that question. It just... is.

The kiss saved his life. And then again. And then again. No, my shock saved his life, and then my hunger for more. To feel his lips pressing into mine with such passion probably only a mortal can possess. To feel his hot skin under my fingertips. To feel his fingernails scratch the skin on my back.

I couldn't help it. I wanted to control myself, but it was impossible.

I nearly fucked him through the wall. And it was fantastic.

I should have killed him then, when he was so helpless. I shouldn't have come up with that stupid idea.

_The Deal_ , Stark calls it.

The  _fucking_ deal.

Literally.

 

It was supposed to be a game, nothing more. Just some fun to enjoy together. It was a crazy idea. Even I can see that, and there have been many doubts about my sanity. I know, some of them were mine. Which probably means I am not as insane as one could think, because a completely insane person would not realize they are insane.

It was a crazy idea and I never expected him to say  _yes_ . I was fully prepared for a battle with at least the Iron Man, more likely with the whole Avengers, when I was making that offer. But he didn't even call for his suit.

And he kissed me and I was lost once again.

Because it was so sincere, so genuine. He wanted to kiss me. He liked it, too. It wasn't The Deal which made him do it. It wasn't the urge to save his life. It was his own need.

I should have killed him when he fell asleep after the sex. I should have cut his neck open and leave him there to bleed to death.

But I don't think I could have done it. It was too late already.

It was supposed to be a game.

When did it go so wrong?

 

I doubt he ever thought I would actually kill him for refusing to sleep with me. It was a game for him, too. A game he enjoyed. A dangerous game. He likes those a little too much, I must say.

No matter how many times he said I was raping him, I always knew he didn't mean it. He was the one to hug me and kiss me and tell me to move my  _lovely ass_ to the bedroom. Well, most of the time. But I never forced him to do anything he didn't want. Sometimes, his mouth was saying no, but the way his fingers were pulling at my hair was saying  _please, more_ .

“Anthony,” I whispered into his ear.

And he panted and moaned and screamed.

And he fell asleep afterwards.

Would he fall asleep if he didn't trust me not to hurt him? I doubt that. And when he wrapped himself around me, when he made me stay for the night...

I found out that I didn't mind staying. Not at all.

 

During the months following those first kisses, I found myself enjoying Anthony's company more and more. It scared me. It scared me even more when I realized that it wasn't fucking him that I enjoyed the most, it was talking to him and arguing with him and making him smile and...

Oh, yes, holding him in my arms and kissing his hair or his temple or his  _lips_ .

I enjoyed our lazy mornings in bed (and how did he manage to  _always_ make me stay?), I enjoyed our even lazier afternoons we spent watching movies. I enjoyed taking showers with him and watching him dress. And undress, of course.

I didn't even think about the reason. There he was, a handsome and intelligent mortal with his beautiful dark eyes which made me shiver every time I looked into them, with his clever tongue and cheeky smile and his absolute lack of  self-preservation instinct. But still a mortal. And still an enemy, as long as I would remain a villain.

I hadn't realized I was falling for him before it was way too late.

 

That was seven days ago.

There was a battle. And he was attacked. Shot from the skies. And he fell.

I was there. I stood on a rooftop and watched. I had been watching their battles for several weeks. Only now I realize why. I wanted to be close to him and make sure he was all right.

And then he was falling. And I did the only thing I could.

I used my magic to slow his fall. I made sure there would be no traces left. I made sure I wouldn't let myself to be seen. It was hard. He was almost too far. I wasn't able to make sure he'd land  _soft_ . I could only make sure he would  _stay alive_ .

He did. He was even able to stand up and walk from the battle by himself.

I nearly wasn't. My heart was beating too fast, my legs and hands shaking too hard, my mind blank and unable to tell me to run.

It was the all to familiar sound of a thunder which woke me up and finally made me flee.

 

Some hours later, I decided it was safe to visit him in the Avengers Tower. I appeared in his living room, as always. But the room was empty. Why was it empty?

“Jarvis?” I quietly asked.

“In the bedroom, sir.”

I was always on good terms with Jarvis. Well, ever since the thing with Anthony started. His invisible servant seemed to... accept me. Maybe he knew I wasn't going to kill his dear master, no matter what I said. Maybe Anthony altered my status somehow. I don't think I want to know.

I opened the bedroom door quietly, in case Anthony was sleeping. And at first, it looked like he was. He was on his side, with his eyes closed and a face pale.

But as I stepped into the room, one of his dark eyes cracked open a little.

“Princess,” he murmured. “Hey.”

“Anthony,” I whispered. I was laying in bed next to him before I knew it, cradling him in my arms. He didn't seem to mind. In fact, he buried his nose into my neck and made a little satisfied _mhmmm_.

“Just a concussion,” he said, although it was a little hard to hear him when he was talking into my shoulder. “Nothing to worry about, sweetheart. _Something_ slowed me down when I was falling. Any idea what it might have been?”

I was prepared for that question. I didn't leave any traces of magic on his armor, but that didn't mean Anthony wouldn't  _realize_ .

“It is a part of The Deal, isn't it?” I raised my eyebrows. “You let yourself be fucked, I make sure you stay alive.”

“I don't think it was quite like that. I think it was more like 'I let myself be fucked and you won't kill me'.”

“I think we both agreed on _kiss and fuck and stay alive_. So this is me making sure you would. Or would you like to raise objections? Because I can kill you if it makes you happy.”

“You know what would make me happy?”

“What, dearest?”

“If you kissed my boo-boos and stayed for the night.”

“You are in no shape for sex tonight, Stark.”

“I never said I was. Just... hold me?”

“That certainly wasn't a part of the deal,” I smirked.

“I know. Please?”

He knew I would stay. I was never able to resist. I pressed a soft kiss into his hair. They still smelled of sweat and battle, with just a little hint of his shampoo. I held him in my arms and my fingers were drawing protective runes on his skin.

I have never been happier in my life. I have never felt more alive.

“There,” I whispered. “Better?”

“Much better.”

He fell asleep shortly after.

I was with him until the first rays of sunlight found their way through the windows. And then I went back into my flat.

And I knew I could never return.

 

It is seven days since I have last seen him. Well, six days and thirteen hours. And twenty-eight minutes.

Twenty-nine.

I am sitting in my flat and trying not to think about him. I've been doing it for the past six days, thirteen hours and twenty-nine minutes.

I miss him. I really do. I don't want to, by I cannot exactly help it, can I?

I miss his smile, I miss the sparkle in his eyes, I miss our almost endless banters, I miss the warmth of his skin...

How could I have let myself grow so fond of him?

Stupid mortal. Stupid Stark. My stupid Anthony.

“He will never love you back,” I whisper to myself. “You have to stop this. Feelings only make you weak. You have to focus, focus on...”

I close my eyes.

Focus on what? I haven't done anything  _bad_ in the past week. It haven't even occurred to me that I could. All the mischief... lost its appeal somehow. What would be the point in causing trouble? That would only mean he would come to stop me.

Maybe I should leave Midgard. Maybe I should travel. Even Jotunheim sounds like a wonderful place to be right now. At least Stark is not there.

It would be better to run away from him.

“Coward,” I murmur. “Look at you. Scared of loving a mortal. Scared of loving your enemy. Scared of... _love_.”

I am so deep in my thoughts I almost don't notice my phone ringing. And when I do, it takes me too long to realize it was  _his_ stupid ringtone,  _Stayin' alive_ , a horrible Midgardian song  _he_ thinks to be fitting, considering our agreement.

When I do realize it, I have already answered the call.

It seems he didn't expect it, because he is quiet for several long seconds. And then, even before I can say anything, he starts talking.

“You bitch,” he says and I know he's drunk. “Where the hell do you think you are? Why did you just vanish like that? Did I do something wrong? Or did you find someone else to fuck? Someone better? What did I do wrong, Loki? Too much sass? Not enough kneeling? Not loving you enough? Too much cuddling? It's the cuddling, isn't it? Because if it is, I can swear we didn't cuddle, you were just trying to keep me in place so I wouldn't escape and call the others. And the kisses were just a way to shut me up. Yeah, definitely. Shit, Loki, I'll say anything if it makes you come back. I'll stop with the rape jokes, they're not funny anyway. Just... fucking tell me what to do. I thought that maybe you just ran away because I made you stay with me and cuddle, I thought you thought you were being too gentle with me, so I thought you'd show up the next day, make some trouble and kick my ass and then come to me in the evening, but you didn't. You've been away for far too long and I fucking _miss you_ , you know? So just talk to me, tell me what to do, because I seriously have no idea, I have never been in love before, I thought I was, but it was never _that_ kind of love, even with Pepper, but this, this _is_ and I obviously fucked up without realizing it and-”

I can't listen to him anymore. It takes me just a second and I stand right in front of him and he is such a mess, pale and unshaven and with his hair sticking in all directions and his clothes dirty. And when he sees me, he just drops his phone and flings himself into my arms and hugs me incredibly tight.

Of course that I wrap my arms around him and hold him close. I can't help it. I can't resist it.

“I hate it when you're drunk.”

“I don't want to be sober if you plan on leaving again,” he murmurs.

I smile and with a little help of my magic, the alcohol is gone from his veins.

“Did you mean it?” I ask.

“That I don't want to be sober if you go away? Hell yes,” he nods.

“That you love me,” I say and my voice nearly breaks at the L-word.

“Hell yes,” he repeats and I feel his nose dig into the crook of my neck. “I hate to admit it, Princess, but I do. It wasn't exactly a plan, but I... You know, you were so... And I thought... I know we have a deal, and this is probably against some nonexistent terms of it, and I know you're a villain, but you don't have to be, you can actually be pretty nice if you want, so if you could be nice to everyone and not just me, maybe we could have an actual relationship, I mean if you... If you... If the things maybe didn't go according to your plans, too...”

“Are you asking me if I love you?”

“Kinda.”

“Yes. I do love you, Anthony.”

I feel him almost melt into my embrace. All the tension in his muscles is suddenly gone.

“Thank God. I mean, you,” he smirks.

“It was just a game,” I murmur. “It never occurred to me that I could...”

“Yeah, you don't need to tell me.” Then he suddenly pulls away and looks straight into my eyes. “By the way, do you realize we're done with _The Deal_? You can't exactly threaten me effectively, now. But of course, you don't have to force me into kissing you anymore.”

“Stark, I have _never_ forced you.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he smiles. “Hey, just to test how it actually sounds when I mean it... I love you.”

He doesn't wait for my answer and kisses me. Gently, at first, but the kiss gets more passionate very soon, passionate and a little violent, too.

It's good. It's so good.

And somehow, I am scared a bit less than before.


End file.
